Filth-ering

I read this one previously at the Null Device, wrote about it on Cafeína, and now it's time for the IF THEN ELSE treatment: Are you a sensitive and aesthetically-conscious person? Or, if you're a female, do you prefer army-style overcoats and boots to bimbo-style clothing? Then, according to the profiling directives circulating in the U.S. of A. (where else?), you are gay. Nice, as always the americans show us that the appearance is more important than the truth. You might ask, "OK, I'd be considered gay in the U.S., so what?" Nothing, unless you consider that this kind of profiling is meant to take people into 'correctional facilities', because it's quite obvious for American legislators that gay people are criminals. Of course, there's the married accountant with three kids at home who says his wife he's going to play bowling, and instead he'll go molest young kids without anyone ever saying anything, but if instead there's this nice and calm arty-type guy sharing a flat with his girlfriend, they're both screwed anyway. If homossexuality turns out to be a genetic property, it's kinda interesting to see how these measures may actually spread it (by forcing people into unwanted marriages for cover-up). Of course that's until mandatory 'genetic filtering' is used on unborn children, to eliminate these 'diseases' (leaving of course real diseases out as that would put pharmaceutical companies out of business). Nice.

Evil flower dust

Well, it's also that time of the year: allergy time. That means I will try to stay away from screens and other things that increase eye strain, as my eyes are all itchy and it's incredibly annoying to work. However, I am still browsing the tips a few good people send me, like Deconcept which remembers me of my own Lab sandbox, except that my site looks crapper. I definitely need to redesign asseptic.org, but definitely not now.

The absynthe fiends

IRC, the other day. Well, I actually don't care much about IRC, I just logon to the usual network, on the usual channel... And I let mIRC stay there on the background, with a pile of browser windows on top, hoping something worthwhile happens. I rarely engage into private conversations, and I never start them. However I had this nice conversation the other day: Besides exchanging a few URLs of arty websites, I had a good conversation about blogging, and how many people turn blogging into a bore by using weblogs as personal diaries. I mean, personal diaries are typically little black books kept on a secret drawer because no one will ever read them. Readers don't need to be reminded of their own problems, so blogs should be, although from a personal point of view, informative and interesting. Depression-based blogs will only appeal to sadistic types who will think "There's someone worse than me". Ain't I right?

My TV set is broken. Which means from now on I'll be a better, well-adjusted person.

Porto European Capital of Alcohol: It's that time of the year. The Queima das Fitas ('Burning of the stripes'), the annual celebration of college students that, apart from some parade on Tuesday, consists of having thousands of people in some field just getting drunk and listening to crappy bands. Portugal leads all European alcohol statistics, and check this: Here in Porto, during this week, people will buy more litres of beer than during the whole Munich Oktoberfest (the most famous beer party in the world). If you consider beer is only half of the story — there's vodka, wine, and incredibly poisonous absynthe-based 'shots', drank by 16-year olds — it's not hard to imagine the biggest pukefest in the world. Which is nice, because while everyone is at it you can get yourself a table on the usually overcrowded bars and pubs.

Gestalt communication

If anyone could tell me what's a Second Bad Vilbel, that'd be nice. But if anyone could tell me what unknown Autechre/Gescom record I jave just captured from this hard-to-read art site (under 'illegal', of course), that'd be nicer.

Speaking of illegal stuff, a new version of WinMX is now available, now it seems to have its own protocol, along with the dying Napster and dozens of OpenNap servers. Just don't forget to use a firewall if you live in a country where police goes after Napster users (like Belgium).

The last fourteen Netscape users

As seen on Slashdot: Denmark, a small country that doesn't export almost anything else but overrated moviemakers and beer (definitely it doesn't export musicians), is considering legalizing music sharing and weakening copyright laws. Mind you, this is very important indeed as Denmark is part of the EU. I hope naapstär.dk lives long enough until the EU decide to kick Denmark out because of this and their anti single currency tradition.

By the way, if you are stuck into Windows and have a reason not to use Internet Explorer (which is a MS product but a good one), and must use a Mozilla-type browser, you could try this one. It's based on older 0.6 build but at least never crashed on me. And it's way faster than NS6.

I spent some time finishing IF THEN ELSE at last, adding an archive viewing system and fixing a few CSS glitches. Many webloggers use Blogger which is fine for almost everyone, however I enjoy being different and I use a mix of my own PHP code along with a customized NewsPro, which is actually a news posting script meant for several users, but I rather use it instead of other blogging/journal scripts, as I feel much more comfortable with it and I kinda know NewsPro inside out. As always, I lost 90% of my time fixing things to prevent it from going wrong on Netscape, used by less than 10% of you. Netscape might have that guerrilla edge, but when I stay up late because of it I can't deny it: I am a Netscape hater.

We'd have been unreasonable people

I'm starting a new exhibition on We Are Unreasonable People, a few proto-goth images I created/bastardised for a production that was never finished. They are not my usual style, but I am so happy with those pictures I had to exhibit them.

The Monocromatica website has been updated yet again. Now that's a lovely logo! For those who don't know, it's a portuguese electronica record label run by a fellow blogger of mine at Cafeína. He has some nice music there, and a few MP3s to download, so I recommend it.

Invert the universe

Ever wondered what was Coca-Cola's secret ingredient? Well, now you can drink your own home-made Cola, which may taste similar to the real thing. Via Memepool.

I have spent 75euro in a couple of CDs and a few magazines. I ordered them from Safety in Numbers, a New York record shop, which most of the money I spent was due to taxes (on both sides of the Atlantic) and shipping fees. Anyway, I don't mind paying such overwhelming taxes for these records, both from Aussie label Surgery Records, as they are quite worth it. Initial Release is a very nice 2CD compilation, enough to keep any good electronica fan happy; and Love Like Life in Miniature by Super Science is an absolutely wonderful record, a Boards of Canada-ish blend of pop and i.d.m., so far my favourite this year. Highly recommended.

It's Alex's ('ziggy' of Cafeína fame) birthday. Happy birthday, limey! Anyway, I wonder why many people's birthdays (me included) are during April or May... Oh, I see, they don't have TV sets on those summer resorts' hotel rooms!

If: I start blogging, then: You start reading

So I decided I should start 'blogging. In fact, it was almost a year ago I decided I should start blogging. I invited a few friends to 'blog along and the result was Cafeína, a sucessful 'blog that is starting to look more like an e-zine, rather than a typical weblog. Trouble is, it's in Portuguese (of the European variety), so 90% of the world's population can't read it. So here's IF THEN ELSE in standard BBC English so everyone from Jamaica to Australia (even in the U.S.!) can read my stupid rants.


FreeWeb is an easy frontend to Ian Clarke's Freenet Project, an encrypted alternative web that seems immune to censorship. Nice. However this still looks like a geek tool, so most people will continue to eat shit sandwiches. Anyway, I can't help feeling sympathy for .free domains. Remember: Free speech is a basic human right.

Looks like the Katastro.fi website has been redesigned. It looks nice, but I can't help feeling a little disappointed after such a long wait. It just takes too much space, and I use 1280x1024. I just hate fullscreen browsing, I'm much more of a windows person .